Conflict of Heart

     Okay, so I've attempted to reflect via blog about my time here in Iowa over the past 2 years. Truth be told, I don't exactly know how to write about it. Every time I've tried, I've been afraid I might offend someone or my tone sounds too miserable to function. This isn't the case at all, it's not that I dislike Iowa, I'm just still adjusting to the culture change. So many people write about being "small town" and moving to the big city, but what about the opposite? Sure, Stephen Bloom wrote a little article about his time here in Iowa that was published in the Atlantic, and people flipped. When I read it, I thought it was quite funny and I understood (sort of) where he was coming from. I think Iowans forgot that he is not a Christian, he's Jewish (I'm pretty sure Iowa is just as Christian as it is white, which is around 90%) and he's not from the big city of Chicago or Minneapolis, he's from San Francisco, California and it's quite different out on the left side of the country. 
     So my conflict is how do I communicate adjusting to the culture of the Midwest without offending the people who live here and without it sounding like I moved to po-dunk nowhere to my East and West Coast friends? Do I have to put a big disclaimer on the top of my post warning people that this is the most rural area I've ever lived in so forgive me? I don't know. So maybe my reflection blog will never be written because I'm afraid of the backlash and offending people. Or maybe the Iowa has rubbed off a little on me... I'm afraid of offending people on a blog? Wow. 
     So here is a quick non-offensive reflection about Iowa. To those people who live in the bigger cities on the West Coast, Fresno is seen as a country hickville, a trashy town or something along those lines. Well Fresno has around a half million people. Here in Iowa, Des Moines is the big city coming in at a massive population of 203,433 and a metro population of 569,633 (thank you Wikipedia). Now that is the biggest city in the state. CRAZY! I've lived in Fresno and New Jersey so please forgive me Iowans when I say that Waterloo/Cedar Falls is a small area. In a lot of ways where I live is kind of like Fresno. Waterloo is about 4-5 hours from any major metropolitan area and Fresno likewise is about 3-4 hours from any major metro area. Waterloo has a reputation of being dangerous and ghetto. South of Shaw, Fresno has the same reputation. Here is what I can't get over. Iowans talk a lot about diversity. I get it, I guess, but then again I don't. When the state as a whole is still over 90% white, it's hard for me to believe this diversity card people are trying to play. Apparently Waterloo has a lot more diversity but when I look, I see a whole lot of vanilla compared to where I am from. There is no beach. This makes me sad. I really, really miss the ocean. No matter how much I adjust to life in Iowa, it will never have a beach. I mean, it's not like I went to the beach every weekend when I wasn't landlocked, but it was nice to know it was there and I could go If that was what my heart desired. It's also really cold here in the Winter. I thought New Jersey was cold, but this place takes the cake. On top of the cold, it's hot too. Not Fresno hot. I miss the dry heat. In Iowa 95 degrees plus humidity is unbearable, I can't breathe in it.  I remember NJ being humid, but not this bad. This is more like Washington DC heat with grossly cold winters. I really only want one extreme, not 2. Don't get me wrong though, I like the fact that we have 4 seasons and I like the idea of snow. I also enjoy going back to Fresno in the winter and seeing people bundled up in scarves, hats, and pea coats when the high is like 50 degrees. On top of that, I enjoy the looks people give me when I'm out in that same weather in just jeans and a long sleeve shirt. 
     Okay, I think that is enough for now.  Maybe someday I'll have the guts to produce a better blog about my time here, until then I will leave you with that.